"Holy Toledo!"

October 23, 2007

“The Bottom Ten” – The NFL’s 10 Worst Teams

Filed under: NFL — Bill @ 12:02 pm

The bottom of the barrel in the NFL, or the race for the number one pick in the ’08 NFL Draft is a rather dubious distinction. There are several contenders but at this time there appears to be a clear cut choice for the best of the worst.

#1- St.Louis Rams: 0-7

For the first time in the 70 year history of the Rams franchise they have failed to win a game after seven weeks. They were close to beating SF in week 2, but other than that it’s been ugly. An offensive line that makes Swiss cheese look like the Berlin wall has led to an injured QB (or two). The Rams score less than a high school freshman, a pathetic 11 points per game. Combine that with a defense that allows 27 pts. per game and you begin to believe that 0-16 is possible.

#2- Miami Dolphins: 0-7

Giving new meaning to the “No Name Defense” the Fish are by far the worst “D” in the NFL. They allow the most rushing yards per game, in fact in just the second half of games they have allowed more rushing yards than some teams do in an entire game. They have given up 33 points per game. The only thing keeping them from being #1 on this list is QB Cleo Lemon (former baseball player Chet Lemon’s kid & RB Ronnie Brown.

#3- San Francisco 49ers: 2-4

Why SF over Atlanta? The 49ers have won 2 games but by a combined 4 points. As bad as Atlanta is the Niners have scored less per game (13) and they have given up more points per game (22.5). Having lost 4 in a row, the 49ers schedule does get easier and QB Alex Smith is about to return.

#4- Atlanta Falcons: 1-6

When head coach Bobby Petrino took the job back in January little did he realize he was stepping into a big pile of dog poo (pun intended). The Michael Vick fiasco may ruin a few more careers than his own. It doesn’t take psychic Jeanne Dixon to predict trouble when a franchise turns to Joey Harrington to lead them out of the darkness.

#5- New York Jets: 1-6

One of only four teams to lose 6 games or more already this year, the Jets as predicted are a surprise team but for all the wrong reasons. One problem is allowing way too many points, over 27 per game. Al Woodall at this very moment has more arm strength than QB Chad Pennington.

#6- Cincinnati Bengals: 2-4

Perhaps the only reason the Bengals aren’t #5 on this list is because they beat the Jets last Sunday. Is there big trouble brewing in Bungle-town? Unless coach Lewis or Carson Palmer puts an end to the infighting this entire team may get arrested for impersonating a contender. Who day ever gonna stop on defense? So far nobody, the Bengals defense is leaking badly allowing over 31 points per game.

#7- Oakland Raiders: 2-4

Since there Super Bowl 37 appearance the team that used to boast being “the winningest team in professional sports” is now the “losingest” team in the NFL by far (16 wins vs. 53 losses!). A commitment to excellence has given way to lack of concentration, inconsistent play, stupid penalties, & a mediocre roster. It speaks volumes when your best player is the punter.

#8- Buffalo Bills: 2-4

Only the 49ers & Rams have scored less than the Bills (84 points). Things are so bad in Buffalo that they have turned to a rookie QB (Trent Edwards) to revive their sputtering offense. Former #1 pick J. P. Losman is looking like a bust, but then what would expect with a name like “Loss-man!”

#9- Philadelphia Eagles: 2-4

Two wins with a healthy Donavan McNabb is all that needs to be said.

#10- Chicago Bears: 3-4

This will not be a popular choice in Chitown, and for the record it was close between the Bears, Texans, Saints, & Vikings. How did “Da Bears” get the nod? Three simple reasons. Reason #1: When your team claims that it’s strength is defense and you allow almost 24 pts. per game vs. teams like K.C., Minnesota, & Philly then defense really isn’t your strength. Reason #2 is Rex Grossman and reason #3 is Brian (never to be confused with Bob) Griese. Give credit to Griese for pulling a rabbit out of his hat last Sunday, but trust me, it’s the exception, not the rule (Pete Gray has a better arm). Of the 137 points the Bears have scored this season Devin Hester has probably scored 100 of them!

— Top 5 Worst Offenses —
(points per game)
11.3 – St. Louis Rams
13.0 – San Francisco 49ers
13.6 – Atlanta Falcons
14.0 – Buffalo Bills
14.6 – Kansas City Chiefs

* Who is the best?
New England at an amazing 39.9 points per game!

— Top 5 Worst Defenses —
(points per game)
33.0 – Miami Dolphins
31.2 – Cincinnati Bengals
30.5 – Cleveland Browns
28.5 – Detroit Lions
27.4 – St. Louis Rams
27.4 – New York Jets

* Who is the best?
Pittsburgh with 13 points per game!

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