"Holy Toledo!"

June 12, 2008

A Mixed Bag Of Bush Nuts

Filed under: News & Politics — Bill @ 6:37 pm
TODAY’S SCOREBOARD
(brought to you by the American Way of Life)

Constitution 1
George Bush 0

The Supreme Court ruled that detainees in Guantanamo “prison” have the right to be heard in civilian courts. In post ruling comments Bush said, “I will abide by the decision but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.” Then he cried scare tactics saying this decision threatened our nation.

Constitutional experts said it was a huge victory for that little old
document we like to call the Constitution

In the small room just behind the podium President Bush was overheard asking, “What in the heck is Labia’s Corpus?”

Slightly embarrassed his advisor corrected him, “Actually Mr. President it’s called Habeas Corpus.”

“Whatever”

ODD AGE THING:
I had another strange growing older moment…. If Obama is elected he will be the first President younger than me.

AND FINALLY…
A few funny moments from recent episodes of Last Comic Standing:

– In Tennessee they now have Pro Life license plates, so when the dude went to buy his plates for his newly purchased Pinto convertible the lady behind the counter said, “Sir, for an extra $20 you can get the Pro Life plates.”

The dude asks, “So are you telling me I have a choice?”

– I went to the doctor the other day about a small growth near my testicle.
The doctor says, “You idiot! That IS your testicle!”

– You have to be careful when you send text messages. The other night I sent a text message to my girlfriend that said, “Come over I’m horny.”

About a minute later my friend Dave calls me. He says “What’s up with that text message?”

“Oh sorry that message was meant for someone else.”

“So do you want me to come over?”

– People are pissed about immigration.
“They’re taking our jobs, they can’t even speak English.”
Well let me tell you something, if somebody who can’t speak English is taking your job, then your job sucks.
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1 Comment »

  1. I HERE THAT THE SANTA ROSA AREA HAS ABOUT 50% OF THE PEOPLE WHO CANT SPEAK ENGLISH.

    Comment by uncle buck — June 16, 2008 @ 12:50 pm


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